Brianna (moderndayeve) wrote in ed_ucate,
Brianna
moderndayeve
ed_ucate

I have two questions/discussions

I just relapsed back into anorexia three months ago and then got out of the clnical weight range about a month ago. I broke up with my fiance and it was very tramatic and stressful. As usual, when something that bad happens, I get so anxious and can't eat. I dropped 15lbs in a month due to the trama and because I'm small so that was all it took to be in that clinical anorexia weight range. I was diagnosed with the illness at 15. I'm 23 now. During that time, I've had periods where I have carried a healthy weight and periods of healthy eating. I even had one 6 month time period where I was bulimic. By most people I've either been considered an anorexic or a purging anorexic. I gained some weight back and am out of that anorexic weight range. While that is an improvment, I can't help but wonder if carrying a "normal thin" BMI all of a sudden makes me not anorexic. Mine is 18.5. I see anorexia as more of a mental thing and one month of being back on track doesn't make me all of a sudden not anorexic anymore especially considering my eight year history with it. According to the DSM I wouldn't be anorexic anymore though. I don't really see how when that relapse first started before I lost enough weight how I wasn't considered anorexic then. I've struggled everyday for 8 years. There have just been points where my weight has been better. I think the DSM actually makes things more confusing. That book is also really triggering for people with eating disorders at least in my opinion. What do you think?

The first time I chose recovery was the summer of 2004 after my freshman year of college. I was a counselor at a camp that summer and the experience forced me to get healthy. I was scared at first, but after the summer I decided to try and keep the weight on and did well weight wise for a year and a half. One day, I was hanging out with my roommate during my junior year of college and she suddenly realized that she used to be taller then me and then all of a sudden I was noticably taller then she was. My jeans were also shorter but I assumed they were shrinking in the dryer. My roommate pulled out the tape measure. I was 5'3''. I had previously been 5'0''. Has anyone else grown when they were older after getting healthy again. I was 21 at the time. I just thought it was interesting that I grew so much after my first recovery and wanted to know if people shared my experiences.
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