June 20th, 2006

flea and anthony

(no subject)

So, lately, I've had the strangest desire to read ED-related literature.

Call me crazy.. because I probably am at this point.

I don't know what it is, but I just feel like reading more about it. I have, of course, read the obvious, Wasted [which, believe it or not, I thoroughly enjoyed.. despite it being extremely triggering and doing nothing to help me in anyway.. except to delve further into this obsession.. though I think I knew that going into it].

If anyone has any suggestions, fill me in. thx.

Otherwise, I just finished 50 minutes of stationary bike..ness. I was supposed to stop at 40 but I have this weird thing.. if the number of miles [or whateverthefuck it is] is past say.. 20.1, I have to go until I reach 20.5. Past 20.5 and I have to go until 21.. though if it's at 21 I usually figure I may as well go to 30.. and, well, it goes on.

Or, if I'm listening to music, I tell myself I have to at least finish the song. but if another one starts, I'll have to finish that one as well.

I also have to end on either a 10 or a 5, as far as minutes are concerned. Example: I can finish at 1:05 or 1:10 but nothing in between.

Yay for incoherency!

Anyway. Anybody have any weird work out quirks? Yea this entry is jumbled and screwy. Fun.

*imma cross-post this baby, too.
  • Current Music
    get on top - rhcp


More stuff from my blog. This came out of group.

Guilt is “feeling bad about something I did or did not do and feeling a need to atone”.

When feeling guilty, do an external check. Would Higher Power* feel guilt? Would I want my good friend Sally-Mae to feel guilt?

Feelings aren’t right or wrong; they just are.

Guilt is “judging of self”.
No judging of self is allowed after situation has happened.

Practice checking in with self.
How am I feeling?
Do this multiple times a day.
This helps me to learn to identify my emotions. It’s a healthy habit to build.

*My Higher Power is a conglamorate of different people, some of whom are in group.
hands down i'm too proud for love

Angelo Del Parigi study

Background: In 2001, Angelo Del Parigi, researcher at the National Institute of Diabetes and Digestive and Kidney Diseases, conducted a study of twenty-two men and women of average health (no dietary restrictions, no addictions or mental health problems, fairly healthy) to see how men and women’s brains responded differently to short-term hunger and satiation.

For seven days, the subjects ate a weight-maintaining diet. Then one morning, no breakfast was served and nothing again all day. The next morning, after thirty-six hours without food, the subjects were taken to a room for a brain scan using positron emission tomography, a mapping of the cerebral blood flow that reveals which areas are being activated.

Note:This is an excerpt from the book "Hunger: An Unnatural History" by Sharman Apt Russell (Basic Books, 2005), pg 27.

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