July 4th, 2006

(no subject)

I was talking to my ex (long story) the other day. I'd just eaten dinner and was starting to go into binge mode when he showed up. I was very anxious, high-strung, but wouldn't tell him why for a while. Being very irrational. We drove around for a while and I finally told him that I couldn't go back to the house because I would binge.
I really laid a lot on the poor kid--but his complete ignorance of EDs amazed me, honestly. He thought "binging" meant puking.
"All you have to do is eat until you're full!"
"You throw up because you eat too much, right?"
"It just seems silly that anyone would do this even one time."
"You can stop, you're just not trying hard enough."
"You just have to eat healthy and stop puking and then you'll be better."
"You can't have a problem with food. It's all in your head. Just sit down and eat a meal..."
"The only reason I can see for your doing this is because you think you're fat."
Et cetera, et cetera.
I was just so surprised--not by how little he knew, but that he knew nothing about EDs at all. He said they were too bizarre and uncommon for him to have heard of before.
I tried to explain to him that it was much much more than just eating until I am full or not puking or losing weight. He didn't believe me. I told him it was like an addiction--he's all into mind power.
It made me wonder how much anyone "outside" understands this--if they can actually think that it is as simple as "she makes herself throw up because she thinks she's fat, all we need to do is make sure she keeps it down..."
Perhaps being male he's just exposed to the issue less. Perhaps being male he's just way more thick-headed (I have to say that because I believe it--sorry boys, I'm a little biased).
...Have you ever come out/talked to someone about your ED to find that they...don't have a clue?

(no subject)

does anyone else binge on vegetables, like i try to eat healthy and not binge so i go fot veggies but then ill end up eating like a whole bag of carrots becuase im so hungry, sometimes i purge from the fullness but usually i dont and i still feel guilty, evne though i know i havent consumed many calories, it truly makes me wonder then nature of what exactly a binge is, if i plan a meal and its X many calories and i eat just that many im okay with it but if i eat less than that but in a seemingly out of control way, my fear of weight gain is HUGE, so i purge...does anyone else only consider it a binge if it was unplanned eating even just a cracker or anything

(no subject)

Hey, I'm tres new here, but as I was reading through some of your posts et comments etc. I noticed that some of you suffer from I.B.S. I suffer from this aswell and I was wondering - If you do have I.B.S., did it stem from your E.D. or did your E.D. stem from the I.B.S.?
And do you think I.B.S. makes recovery more/less difficult?
My E.D. came from focusing so much on my food intake due to ibs symptoms, and I feel more reluctant to let my ED go because it lessens the effect of ibs, as in, if i don't eat (or am 'empty') i don't get trouble from ibs. So I think it makes recovery harder for that reason, and also because it causes bloating and discomfort after food which seems doubled in recovery because you have the added bloating and discomfort from keeping food down.
Anyhoo, I was just wondering how many suffer like this, and what your thoughts are on the subject - much love
~xxx~
  • Current Mood
    exhausted