August 24th, 2006

flea and anthony

(no subject)

I went to the doctor today for my annual physical.

and my doctor said I was in perfect health. Part of me was completely relieved [my mom was in the room], but there was another part of me that felt absolutely ashamed. I felt that I obviously didn't have a serious disorder because there were no traces of it.

I'm not underweight, because I've been on a horrible binge/purge cycle, so I'm in the normal range, but I figured there'd at least be something wrong with my throat. Or my heart. Or.. something.. somewhere. but no. Apparently I'm in fine health.

I just feel as if I'm not truly eating disordered because of this. I feel like a failure. I feel like I'm not doing it properly. My binges don't really count, my purges don't count. I feel as if what I'm doing is normal.

Has anyone had a similar experience? Almost wanting to be sick.. but still being relieved that you're hiding your disorder? Ehh I don't know what I'm saying anymore.
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(no subject)

Currently it is difficult to acquire a medical degree of "Eating Disorder specialist". In North America there is only a few (as few as one or two!) recognized (for the most part - what do insurance companies recognize, really?) as instituations that are qualified to give you the title of ED specialist.

For those of you who are attempting to break into an area of medicine that deals with EDs, I have found a website with all the information about a school that certifies individuals with the title, and is, for the most part, recognized.

The website is:
it certifies you either with specialty in the nutritional well-being of the individual, or mental well-being. whichever aspect you wish to explore.