lightasabrick (lightasabrick) wrote in ed_ucate,
lightasabrick
lightasabrick
ed_ucate

Fear

Just wanted to have a little discussion surrounding fear and this eating disorder being an excuse for my fear. i find that i am afraid of pretty much everything, the dark, abuse, men, aliens, you name it..rational or irrational, i am afraid. Despite all of this, the biggest fear for me, I think is the fear that I am inept. That I cannot succeed in the things that I want to. Right now I am 2 years away from completing my degree, and I feel like I want to use my eating disorder as an excuse for failing. Eg-"i couldn't get my degree because i was too sick" as opposed to the truth "i didn't get my degree because I was afraid I am too stupid, so instead of finding out if i really AM stupid, i got sick and used it as an excuse".
Thoughts? Similar Experiences? Words that need to be said??
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