Willingness to change
What do I want to change? How motivated am I? How willing am I? What do I think my chances of success are?
|-||no more binging||7||5||5|
|-||no more restricting*||10||8||10|
|-||keep food log||5||1||5|
|-||stop weighing myself||10||9||10|
*No More Restricting
Why is my willingness to stop an 8 and not a 10? I still want to lose weight.
Why isn't my willing to stop restricting a 5? Restricting leads to binging, leads to purging behaviors, leads to restricting, leads to binging, and unending spiral into the black depths of the eating disorder.
Why is my willingness a 5 and not a 7? Still want to lose weight, still kinda like feeling hungry and the sense of power that gives me. I want my willingness to be higher, but it isn't.
Why not a 3? 3/2 keeps me from restricting and keeps me healthy.
The stop weighing one is interesting. I think a year ago my motivation would have been a 3, my willingness a 1, and my success a 1. It's nice to see some progress and gains from all this work.