The Tyra Banks Show- Dying to be Thin
Tyra: In my era models were 10 to 20 pounds heavier.
21 year old Brazilian models mother speaks about her daughter and her death:
She was fitting in so well, she was booking jobs, everyone was happy for her. I realized her career was hurting her when she came back from China she hugged me and said, ‘Mom I need to lose weight. They want me to lose weight and I need to support you guys.’”
She was five foot 7 and 114 then. She spent 3 months resting with her mother, then went back to the city to help out her parents.
“She was starving herself, afraid of gaining weight, and afraid of losing jobs.”
She weighted 99 pounds when she died
“I only hope more girls don’t fall into the same trap, it is nothing but a dream and it is not worth dying for.
Now Tyra with 4 very different models on stage. They have a cardboard cut out of a model that was recently in a fashion show. She is in a bathing suit, she is five foot 7 and estimated to be 90 pounds.
First model who when younger spent years trying to become thin like Danielle the 3rd model, but gained weight slowly and is still happy with her new body:
She doesn’t think the media ‘killed’ the Brazilian model. She thinks you should blame family and friends.
Plus size model, Mia (the 2nd model on stage): I believe it is her agency for not alerting someone when they saw what was happening.
Danielle 3rd model: Weighs 88 pounds and is complaining she doesn’t look skinny enough sitting. She is overweight for her. She says she is eating healthy and her body is healthy and that she talks to a doctor who verifies this.
Tyra: what about your mind, do you think it is healthy?
Danielle I don’t mean fat I mean fat relative to what I see in the mirror. I mean fat for me.
4th person, the model agent: I would never hire that model (referring the the card board cut out), she would be a bad influence on young girls ect.
Tyra in response to the 88 pound model Talks about how when she was 11 she weighed 88 pounds, she didn’t look healthy, but she was 11. Said that doctors poked her with needles and people believed she was anorexic, but she was only 11.
“When you were 104 pounds you wanted to shoot yourself you thought you were too fat?”
After the break
88 pound model speaking about what she eats: Mostly vegetables and fruits, no meat or chicken, tofu. Says you can get a lot of food into 800 and 1000 calories. Its better than eating hamburgers and French fries! (gets defensive).
Tyra: Why did you say you wanted to die when you weighed 104?
88 pound model: Maybe it was an expression. I didn’t like my body, I don’t like curves, I line fine and sharp lines.
Model Agent: Do you think that’s normal? When you look in the mirror you want to see everything cut off your body!
88 pound model: But that’s my bodys’ shape!
Model Agent: That scares me to not enjoy your womanly curves and have childbearing hips. (something about to want to be that thin).
I missed some of it, but now the plus size model, mia, and the 88 pound model, Danielle are speaking
Mia: I’m curvy baby!
Danielle:Then you’re fat! Whats your diet consist of? Greasy hamburgers and French fries!
Everyone thinks Im sick with anorexia! Because I’m skinny! (at this point she is shouting, again).
Tyra: You don’t think you are anorexic?
Danielle: Of course not I’m eating! I’m super healthy!
On the Weight to Height ratio, how some models are being banned.
First Model: For years and years I was like you trying to be thinner. I finally gained weight, slowly, but now in Europe I wouldn’t be able to work because I’ve gained some weight.
Mia (the plus sized model): thinks its good, more woman are a 12 + it’s more realistic.
Tyra- Thinks it is great to help models not feel they have to starve themselves to work. They won’t look at the person who weighs less and see them booking jobs and feel they have to be thinner, they will look at the one who is bigger than them booking more jobs and they will want to gain weight also. But to the girls at home 110 and 120 pound models, they still see that as skinny and she thinks it will still pressure them.
Danielle (88 pound model): You cant blame it all on the outside, what about family what about friends!
Model Agent: There are families that want their daughters to be thin so that they can book jobs and support them. A lot of models come from 3rd world countries, where there is famine.
-Didn’t get this due to the confusion and mess and shouting but Danielle, again, got defensive-
Tyra: You are being so defiant, speaking loud… (got cut off)
Danielle: Im skinny and healthy! I was I was not saying I look fat!
Tyra to the audience:
How many household models can you name that are this scary thin? (cardboard cut out). Okay now how many celebrities can you name like that.
Now there is a 27 year old woman, the doctors say she shouldn’t even be alive, she is 75 pounds (the weight of the average 9 year old), has two kids and a husband. Her name is Lori
Lori: Growing up I never had any issues with eating disorders or with my body, looks, or dieting. There were no signs of an eating disorder, after the birth of 2nd child I decided I wanted the weight off. I dieted after 6 months it became an obsession, one day its that my face is too fat, one day arms, its always something. I wake up and start my day with coffee and smoke cigarettes the occasional diet pills and in the evening I allow myself 100 to 150 calories. My last words before I go to bed are “I’m sorry” I go to bed afraid I ate too much. I’m now irritable and I snap very easily
My children are on edge, they know that their mom is thin and sick and that mom needs to eat, but I would rather die than be fat. I would rather be dead than to have to deal with the mental torture of being fat, I think that we live in a day where it doesn’t matter if women are successful or smart it matters what women look like. I don’t know if it (her eating disorder) will go away, somedays I don’t even know if I want it to go away.”
Tyra: So you would rather die than be fat? You would rather leave your sons than be fat?
Lori You become so, so mentally enwrapped in it that you forget what your life was ever about. All of your hopes and dreams that were once so important to you are gone, nothing matters but being skinny/
Tyra: Its so odd for me right now I’m looking at you and I see a 9/10 year old girl, but your voice is that of a woman. You are 75 pounds, what do you see when you look in the mirror?
Lori I see a spot on my arm, a new role on my side, I have a lot of problems with my face, I’ve always said you know my face is really fat my face will never get thin enough.
Tyra: What about every body else? Do you think everybody sees you the way you see you? Because all I see are bones, skin, and hair.
Lori: Some people, yes I think they look at me and think, “yes the girl is way too thin.”
Tyra: Do you know you are sickly? Do you think you are way to thin?
Lori: I know that I am sick, ill, not way too thin.
Tyra: And that your illness makes you feel fat so you don’t see what we see?
Tyra: Do you think the media has anything to do with your eating disorder?
Lori: Oh absolutely, I strongly feel that it has a huge impact on it, I buy the magazines, that cause… I see now first hand the pain it causes you guys. And you know we buy these magazines that are promoting people like everyday people like me into, in, an unrealistic thinness. (at this point she was upset, and stammering somewhat)
Tyra: What do you think about her situation?
Author of “Life Doesn’t Begin Five Pounds From Now” (which I now want to read) she has a history of eating disorders. She is overweight:
I think this is the disease talking we are hearing what anorexia sounds like, its not based on logic and I think just like women who start obsessing about baby weight, what she is speaking is unrealistic, but it feels right on the inside, and she’s in danger and she knows she’s in danger.
After the break Loris’ husband joins them.
Tyra: What is it like seeing your wife struggle?
Phillip (Loris husband): It is horrible, everyday I wake up I never know (crying) if it’ll be the last day that I see her.
Tyra: What does it feel like, Lori, to hear your husband say that?
Lori: It hurts but the eating disorder lies to you, nothing is going to happen, you’ll be fine.
Tyra: You are afraid she’s not going to wake up in the morning, what have you done?
Phillip: I stopped working for a while, for as long as I could, just to try and take care of her and spend time with my wife (before she dies). Last time we asked the doctor, he said it’s the different kind of an eating disorder that will kill her. She’s not going to pass out or faint, she’s just going to die one day.
Tyra: How are two boys dealing?
Phillip: Our first son knew Lori before the eating disorder, she was way different, and its hard on him, he struggles in school when he used to be good, attention is worst also.
Lori: Our younger son says mommy eat something. I’ll say mommy eats vegetables. Or he says mom try this, I’ll say no you know I don’t eat that
Tyra: what do you want to say to your husband?
Lori: That I’m sorry, I’m sorry that our life has become what it has.
Tyra: And to your boys?
by this point everyone is crying somewhat and Lori is covered in tears.
Lori: They are the reason that I’m still alive. You don’t know how many mornings I’ve woken up and said, I’m not going to deal with this again today, I’m not going to deal with this again today, it is mental torture everyday for me, and then.. I’ll hear their footsteps or I’ll hear them cough or move in their room, …….. And I’ll realize you have two boys that don’t understand and love their mom, and so I get up and do it.
Lesli a doctor:
I’m a med doctor at (something) ranch in Arizona? Its for woman with eating disorders.
Tyra: Do you think she can get well on her own?
Lesli: Absolutely not she needs intensive treatment people say just eat, but its not that easy, it requires a multiple disciplinary team.
Tyra: Do you want to get better?
Lori: Most days
Tyra: Would you take the help?
Lesli: We have treated over 7000 women we, understand the toll its taken on you and family and we want to help. (Offered intensive treatment at no cost).
Tyra: How does that sound to you?
Lori: It’s a scariest thing to imagine, but yet, it’s the best thing I could of asked for.
I think a lot of us can relate to how she feels there.
At the end Tyra talks to Jessica (the author of that book) about stereotypes and eating disorders. Jessica says that eating disorders effect EVERYONE, no matter what your race, sex, sexual preference, social status, income, ect everyone can be effected.
Then Tyra talks about the whole media thing, they said she looked fat? I’ve not heard about that yet, not really. I read a sentence about it on yahoo homepage.
She said first she was personally hurt. But then she thought about the girls who look up to her. Who email her and tell her that she is curvy and beautiful the way she is. And she said that those girls who look up to her, see themselves in her, and see that they are beautiful the way THEY are, and when the media is saying that Tyra is too fat, she is afraid that the girls are going to see that as the media saying they are too big also.
Jessica talked about how its not just a ‘thin girls’ disease. She said she was starving and binging and purging and struggling and that she didn’t look like she was in danger, but she was. And a lot of girls think that if you aren’t stick skinny then you can’t really be sick or in danger, but you can.
Tyras ending statement:
Please look in the mirror and try and love what you see, this does not happen over night this is a progress.
What do you think about it?